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Well here we are at Wednesday and today's topic is carers........
These are my thoughts and not directed at anyone person just a generalisation of carers and how they should be acting.
Do you know what a carer is?
Do you have a carer?
Are you a carer?
I have a carer my daughter Tasha is my official carer not my husband this is because Tim works full time is often working when I am in need of help.
I can no longer shower myself or wash my own hair, I can have a bubble bath, if someone is here to help me dry off and get dressed.
I can fix my self sandwiches and toast or boiled eggs and of course a bowl of ice cream. I can not cook myself any food, I also can not drive anywhere or go shopping.
My daughter/carer is only 30 seconds away and comes whenever I text or ring help arriving sometimes before I am finished talking.
She does all the shopping or other tasks I ask her to do.
If you accept the position of carer, you need to be there caring not saying ask this or that person to do what has been requested. This is ok once in a blue moon, but not something you say most of the time.
You need to be available to bathe the person in your care at least once a week if not more.
Even if the person you care for has a person come in to clean and change the sheets once a week or fortnight they may still need you their carer to do some household chores for them without hearing the annoyance in your voice or seeing you roll your eyes because you are too busy to do what is requested.
Now if a carer isn't being paid and is caring as an act of love not always being there is ok, if however, they are paid they need to be there. Do not accept payment if your own life is so busy you are unable to be there when needed.
Dearest Jo-Anne,
ReplyDeleteWe call it care-taker here in the USA but I fully understand the Aussie version.
Yes, it takes a lot of dedication and above all a big heart!
It also is not easy for the once receiving care as they at times feel like being a burden for others.
Life is not easy and aging is not for the faint of heart.
One never knows what lies around the bend.
Hugs,
Mariette
I am sorry you need so much care - it must be hard.
ReplyDeleteKudos to your daughter being the care taker.
You are BLESSED.
Not everyone - in fact I don't think most people have a care taker like that.
Life is hard - both ways.
At least you have someone who will care for you as in a carer as not all will even if they have the time.
ReplyDeleteUnderstand about a carer only too well, I was one for my dad for 6 years, till his death.
Take care.
You have a wonderful daughter, I'm glad for that. I don't think either roads is easy: being the cared-for person or being the caretaker. It does take a lot of love and patience if family members are involved. (Even when they aren't!)
ReplyDeleteThere's also more understanding now about caretaker burnout, particularly in regard to caring for aging parents with dementia. I know my mom struggled so much with her husband as he declined (he passed a few years ago now). She has her own health issues and isn't physically robust; eventually my step-dad had to go into a nursing home because she simply couldn't physically manage his needs.
I used to think, when I was young, that life got easier as you got older. Ha!
That must be hard, Jo-Anne. Thank God you do have your daughter who can "care" for you. I use to be my step-daughter's official "payee" through the social security disability. More like a "financial carer." I also was able to get her plugged into services.
ReplyDeleteIT started not to work out between us - So she was able to get an agency to care or her financial needs. And through them has plugged into even more services.
She has memory issues so one day, she might be in the need of a caretaker or "carer". She is 39.
Take care Hon. We all we need carers one day; some now, all of us later.
God bless Tasha.
ReplyDeleteLove,
Janie
All I 'know' about being a carer I learned when it was basically our role in Scrappy's last few months. It is hard to eat your frustration and remember that of the person you care for. Harder still to be screaming in your head, "Why can't he/she do this?" when your heart knows you're WISHING they could still do everything- that every thing they can't do is a loss YOU are suffering.
ReplyDeleteMariette......Yes you need a big heart and a lot of patience, I often feel like a burden
ReplyDeleteSandie.....Yes it is hard and I know I am blessed
Margaret D.......I know I am, my mum cared fro dad's father and aunt because she felt it was the right thung to do
Kea........When you get to a certain age all it all gets too hard
Debby......The role of carer is a hard one
Janie.....I agree
Chris.....Being a carer is big task and not for everyone, I would suck at it
Please don't... we all can end like that! 💞
ReplyDelete