Wait till your father gets home............yes or no
Today let's talk a little about punishment of children, on many tv shows when I was growing up you would usually hear the mother say the words “ wait till your father gets home”...............
These are words I never heard my mum say, if we were naughty she dealt with it, if we had to wait till dad got home we could have been waiting a few days, so mum thought it was better to deal with the issue when it happened.
Maybe this is why when my girls were little if they misbehaved I dealt with it, although Kathy has said she remembers me saying it but she is wrong. What I did say often when the girls were not paying attention to me was “either I can deal with this now or you can wait till dad gets home and let him deal with it”.
Of course with those options they would chose to let me deal with the issue because I didn't go off my head like Tim would. I also would tell Tim about any issues when he got home and I would tell him that I had deal with it, sometimes he thought I was too soft and want to add more punishment but I would say that is undermining me and that would also piss me off when he would try and do it.
If the issue was a serious one I might say to the girls that I would have discuss with dad their punishment, this they didn't like because Tim would go overboard in my opinion. Many times he would want to throw things in the bin because they wouldn't clean their room, this I thought was overboard because if we tossed it we would only have to replace the items at a later date. I would confiscate things and they would have to earn them back.
On many occasions I would tell Tim his punishment didn't match the crime, if fact I often said he was acting like they committed armed robbery when in fact they just didn't pay for a lollipop but things are wrong both things are theft but you don't toss someone in goal for pinching a lollipop. It any of that makes sense, it often didn't to Tim.
Did I smack my girls, yes I did a firm smack on the bum wasn't and isn't abuse, also Kathy had a habit of kicking the bedroom wall when sent to her room and I would go in and smack her legs, once I didn't hoping she would calm down and stop and she ended up kicking a hole in the wall, which made things worse when Tim found out.