I am sure pretty much every parent has
experience sleep deprivation at some point here are 10 signs you may
be experiencing sleep deprivation:
Inability to handle stress
Poor Memory
Inability to Concentrate
Increased Appetite
Vision Problems
Poor Decision Making
Diminished Motor Skills
Relationship Troubles
Medical Problems
Mood Swings
Now if this is a problem you suffer
with there is help available so don't suffer in silence, ok let's be
honest you wouldn't be suffering in silence you would be letting
everyone you come into contact with know you are sleep deprived
because you will be in such a terrible mood.
Now if you are a parent of a child that
doesn't sleep and you have a partner/spouse than you need that person
to be supportive of you while you attempt to get your difficult child
into a better sleeping routine.
If they prefer to lock themselves away
in a different room so they can't hear the child that is crying and
preforming that is only going to make you mad and pissed off with
them because you will feel like you are doing it alone. If you are
the one who locks themselves away in a different room than shame on
you, you need to be helping.
Dealing with a child that doesn't want
to sleep is stressful, the easy thing is to pick them up and rock
them and try to get them into a deep sleep before putting them back
to bed, but that often will backfire on you and because of that it is
better to not pick them up but to give them their dummy if they have
one and stand and pat their bottom and maybe talk to them quietly in
soft voice till the start to settle again, then leave the room and if
they start to cry the moment you start to walk away, keep walking
shut the door and give them 5 minutes before going back in if needed.
This is not easy I know but it can and
does work you may have to go into them many times over and hour or
two but if you do this all the time they will eventually start to
settle quickly. Sometimes a baby or child will know that if they cry
and perform enough they will get their own way. Breaking the patten
isn't easy.
It is when you are trying to break a
patten or set up a new routine that you need the understanding and
support of your partner, it doesn't matter whether the partner is the
parent of the child they are your partner and as such they should be
supporting you.
My oldest daughter Kathy-Lee was a
terrible one when it came to settling her this was from birth and as
a toddler we had many nights when she would not want to sleep, even
though she was tired. I however, was luck in that most nights I had
Tim here being supportive and we would take turns taking her back to
bed and she would come out a couple of dozen times a night but each
time one of us would take her back to bed. We didn't stay and have
long talks to her, we just put her back into bed and leave and 10
minutes later she would be back out again.
As a baby Kathy wouldn't settle either
and at first I made the mistake of always picking her up and rocking
her and settling her but soon realised it wasn't working because as
soon as I put her in the cot she would cry again so I stopped that
and moved onto the standing next to the cot and patting her bottom
till she settled again than walking out of the room and yes most of
the time she would cry as soon as I started to walk away or as soon
as I got out of the room but I learnt not to go back into her
straight away I waited a few minutes before going back.
I am not going to tell anyone that it
was easy it wasn't it was in fact bloody hard and bloody stressful
and I had many times when I would sit in the hall way crying and
saying I couldn't do it anymore. It was too hard and she hated me and
I was a failure as a mother, there was many times when I would get so
angry with her I would shake with rage, (me not her) I never shook
her but it wasn't always easy I did have to put her in her cot and
walk outside for a few minutes to calm myself before going back in
and dealing with her again.
I will not tell you either that Tim was
the biggest help, because he wasn't always a help there was times
when he would be like, “ I have been at work all day and need a
rest”. I would think what do you think I have been doing all day
sitting around having tea party, yes when he was young I am sure Tim
didn't see being a stay at home mother as a real job but some kind of
easy life.
I always think it is amusing when I
hear about men who don't want to watch their child all day because
they have things to do and it will take time away from what they want
to do. Women have things to do also but we manage to do most of the
things while watching the child or children at the same time. Why do
they think it is ok for a woman to have to deal with children while
trying to work from home, or study from home as well as doing all the
housework and cooking meals and than in the evening bathing children
and getting them ready for bed.
Than they are expected to deal with a
child or children that do not want to settle and go to sleep but
fight and cry.