Tuesday, 13 January 2009
Living on thin Ice
I went and saw my counsellor yesterday it was good to talk to her; I have been doing a lot of thinking the last few days about how Tim has been.
He has black outs caused by his drinking and it isn't easy to deal with. I am so over his drinking and carrying on I wouldn't and don't mind if he drinks and doesn't get loud and abusive but as it is I can't tell from one weekend to a next how he is going to be.
Had another big fight here on Saturday night causing Jessica to leave with Leo and not come back till late when he was in bed. At the time he kept saying I didn't love him and I wanted a divorce which just pissed me off. When I tried to talk to him on Sunday about it he of cause didn't want to talk about it saying that was last night why bring it up now........so what did I do I brought it up at my parents place and we discussed it there but still not answers.
I am numb by it all and feel like I am at breaking point. I will try and talk to him again I want to tell him that I want him to show me he is willing to make some changes........like when I think he has had enough to drink if I say so he doesn't get abusive with me...lol…. don't see that happening.
Tim he can be fine for ages then for some reason he will go off his head. I feel like I am walking on ice wondering if the next step will cause it to crack.
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