This is me

I was told last night that I have let myself go because of how big I am. If it was easy to stop eating and if I could walk I would do so but these things are easier said then done, just because you don't see me trying doesn't mean I am not doing the best I am able to do, feeling bad about how I look doesn't help when it comes to weight loss because when one is depressed and feel that nothing they do works one feels why am I bothering but still I try and still I get up and spend 60-70 minutes each morning exercising does anyone thing I want to be a short fat woman who struggles to do things.

Do you think I like all the muscle strain and pain and not being able to move my legs and arms without pain. I may be big but I am trying to like who I am and learn to deal with it while still trying to lose weight and be slimmer. I try to dress nicely................Being told you have let yourself go doesn't help and people cannot tell me what to do that will help, because what I am doing isn't working so I have no bloody idea what else to do.

This is me, this is who I am at this stage in my life, I am still the same person just in a bigger package, telling me I look fat doesn't help, try telling me I look nice and help me feel loved and needed and not like a failure. Because I often feel like I am a failure, in case you didn't know..................

Did you know Monday

Here we are at another did you know Monday, it is a cold Monday too and a tad wet outside I have been up since 4.30am done over an hour of exercise, have taken Leo to school and read like 40 blog posts and now I am going to share these facts with you...................

In M & M chocolates the letters stand for Mars and Murri, the developers of the sweets in 1941.......

The Atlantic Ocean is saltier than the Pacific Ocean......................

At one time in Japan fashionable women painted their teeth black............................

Three our of four women wear the wrong size bra..................................

A butterfly had 12,000 eyes...................................

Someone opens a can of Spam every four seconds................................

Random thoughts No1

Here are this weeks first random thoughts and things, I will be doing this type of post most weeks.

Ever had a moment when you are trying to cut a sandwich in half and are finding it difficult and then you realise you have the knife upside down and felt like a dill......................

Some days I eat too much.......................

Mostly I am happy.......................

Taking your shirt and singlet off in pubic because you're stating to feel warm and no longer want the singlet on..............

Seems even 28% of Muslims find women in a full burqa makes them feel uncomfortable.................

Seems that the 2017 flu is the worst on record here in Australia....................................

I write a lot of letters...............................

This is the warmest August we have had in years.....................................

But still there are some bloody cold days and nights...................................

I like banana and choc chip bread, thinly sliced and toasted under the grill............................

Looking in a mirror

How many times a day do you look at yourself in the mirror?

I know some people spend a lot of time looking at themselves in a mirror but I am not one of them, the only times I find myself looking at myself in a mirror is when I am brushing my hair or putting make up.

Now when I wash my hands after I go to the toilet there is a mirror above the sink but I rarely take any notice of myself when I chance at it while washing my hands.

Being a large woman I find many mirrors make me look bigger then I feel not saying they make me look bigger then I am just bigger then I feel.

Yes I check how I look in a mirror before going out that I think is just natural but I don't feel the need to check how I look many times a day

Old Cards and Letters

Do you save old greeting cards and letters?

When I was younger I kept some cards and letters but not any more as a rule, although if I received a really nice card I may keep it.

When I see in movies and tv shows people finding a small pile of letters that have been kept I generally think who keeps letters, although I do get keeping some letters.

However, it is not something I generally do. I write and receive a lot of letters each year so if I was to keep all I received I would have boxes and boxes of letters.

Did you know Monday

So here we are at Monday, I have been out this morning doing some things for mum and going to the chemist to pick up medications that I need for the week.

I had a baked lunch here yesterday with Kathy, Jessica and Summer and Leo and of course Tim who was off.

Anyway since it is Monday it is did you know day

Californian Frank Epperson invented the ice lolly or lollypop in 1905, when he was 11 years old. He left a glass of soda or pop and a stirrer outside overnight and in the morning discovered them frozen together.

A pound of crisps cost about 200 time more than a pound of potatoes 

Just another Friday

Well here we are at 5pm on Friday afternoon after a lovely winters day with temps in the high 20's although in some parts of the state it is snowing and have some of the best snow falls in years but not here. I have been wearing shorts today, the next couple of days are suppose to be warm as well but we will see.

This morning I gave the wheelchair a miss when I went to Woolworths to get a few things, I managed to walk without much trouble but when we finished there I was starting to limp so before I went to the chemist and Big W I got the wheelchair and Jessica pushed me around.

Tonight my ankle is sore but not overly sore so ok, my back is aching as well as my head and I feel like going to sleep but such is life.