I need help, how do I get out of thinking of myself as a victim? I am always putting myself down and I don’t know why I do it. I never seem to think I am good enough and I worry a lot about letting people down.
Is it because I am often in the line of fire when my girls lash out? Or maybe it has something to do with the fact that my husband rarely listens to me and has a habit of walking away while I am talking to him, although he does it to other people as well. I think also the fact that Tim keeps putting off getting a car that I can drive doesn’t help and yes I know that I tell him it is ok but I don’t deep inside it isn’t but I never seem to be able to tell him that. I think the fact that when we discus it he will go one about how little money he has and how he wants to save for this or that and I agree with him but somewhere inside me I think what about me.
I don’t like what I see when I look in the mirror as I am overweight and most of my clothes don’t look good on me, well that’s how I feel and honestly I have no idea whether that is true or not. As lately I have a habit of doubting myself.
I never use to be like this and I don’t like this person I want to be the old happy Jo-Anne who liked herself.
Kathy just said to me what do I like about myself but I have no idea what I like about myself anymore.
I would love to know what others think is my best feature.
What I do know is that my girls will most likely not read this as they are not interested in reading my blogs, they really are not interested in a lot of the thinks that interest me. Even when we go shopping I often get the feeling that they once we do what they want they are ready to go home and again I say nothing.